


Desperate Alliances

by darkgaaraluver



Category: Lucifer (TV), Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood-centric, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Good Parent Robert Lightwood, Hurt Alec Lightwood, M/M, Magnus Bane in Edom, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Alec Lightwood, mild past homophobia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-07-29 13:30:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20083024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkgaaraluver/pseuds/darkgaaraluver
Summary: Alec is on his last ropes after Magnus leaves to Edom. While doing research at Magnus's loft he finds a lead that may get him some help. At a price.Takes place between seasons 4 and 5 of Lucifer and episode 3x20 of Shadowhunters and supports canon up to then.





	1. Family?

It’d been days now. Days of Alec doing nothing but going through every single piece of paper in Magnus’s loft in a desperate attempt to find  _ anything _ , anything at all that would help him bring his fiance back to him. 

He wasn’t sure when he had last eaten or spoken to anyone other than a brief text to a worried Izzy. He had passed out on Magnus’s desk twice already when his stamina runes had given out, but even that was no indication of how long he’d been at it. 

As soon as he’d fall unconscious he’d dream of Magnus. Only to wake and have him be gone. Even the thought of moving to an actual bed when Magnus wasn’t there caused him physical pain.

His mind had already turned to last resort scenarios when he finally stumbled on something he could use. 

Magnus had hidden a new looking folder as far out of sight as he possibly could, as if in an effort to forget it’s existence. Even in the folder the information was written strangely. Information about people getting all manner of impossible favors done for them in the LA region. Pages dedicated to possible greater demon and even angelic activity. 

On the last page Magnus had just written,  _ Family? To Check Later. _

Alec just stared at the end page blankly for a long time. He knew it was impossible for Magnus to have family on his mother’s side still living after so many centuries, and with the other information in the binder it was clear that this was no mundane matter.

But his own father was now filling in as temporary head of the LA institute, with Max tagging along. Surely if they were dealing with a threat on this level Alec would have heard?

If Magnus was related to whoever this is then that person must be a greater demon or… well Asmodeus was a fallen angel. Alec felt as his face twisted into a sneer that he might have been ashamed of in other company. He’d long learned that even angels couldn’t be trusted. Not entirely. Not with his family.

Alec grit his teeth. He didn’t really have any other even close to sane ideas. 

Alec had to try.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Alec had wasted no time in getting ready to leave. He’d already been packed and geared up, on the phone with Catirina when he’d found Lorenzo as a lizard. 

He’d gone back to the institute to grab some things and officially put Izzy in charge. Both her and Jace had wanted to come, even though he’d only told them that he needed to go visit Max and his dad at the LA institute to get some more information. It took him longer than he had wanted it to, to convince them to stay behind. Izzy, he needed to stay and watch the institute and report back to him and Jace had to watch over Clary, who Alec could see was still in no state to be left without Jace. In the end everyone had let him leave after a hug, even Clary and Simon jumping in last second. 

Normally Alec would have turned them down, but as it was the hugs almost made him tear up. It was hard to remember that he still had family without Magnus there. That he had friends who loved him. People who counted on him to look after them. Reason’s he’d not already gone the drastic route and was still trying to find another way even if it leads him on a wild goose chase.

Catirina’s portal dropped him right outside the LA institute. He didn’t pause before he marched in. Max and his father greeted him at the door, Max with a long hug having not seen Alec since before the rift had opened. 

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  
  


A couple days later and Alec was confident he’d found what he was looking for, although when he’d started he had no idea who might be on the other end of his quest. The name Lucifer Morningstar circling his head. Before Magnus left he may have balked at the thought. 

Now he was standing outside a nightclub named Lux and he couldn’t care less who he had to talk to as long as it got results. 

He risked using a glamour to get past the bouncer, but was quick to deactivate it once he was inside. If it was actually Lucifer he was dealing with the chances of him being alone without an entourage were slim to none, so it was better to assume everyone inside could see through a glamour. And if you were going to ask someone to do a favor for you making them think you wanted to sneak up on them was a bad idea. He did keep the basic glamours for his weapons up to prevent any mundanes from freaking out though. 

Alec hadn’t been in a club since he’d met Magnus at his own club. The memories threatened to overwhelm him his whole way inside. 

Once he was actually in the main room of the club the memories took a back seat. It was nothing like Pandemonium on the inside. It was much smaller and the stereo was turned off in favor of a man playing a piano in the middle of the room. 

He skirted the edge of the crowd until he was at the bar, not wanting to draw attention to himself. He slid onto a stool and gestured the bartender over. It was a moderately attractive man working and he greeted Alec in a friendly enough manor. 

Alec barely returned the greeting, leaning across the bar so he could keep his voice down when he talked. “I’m looking for a Lucifer Morningstar? I need a favor.”

The bartender’s face dropped a bit. “Ah, Mr. Morningstar didn’t tell me he had a client coming. You’ll have to wait, that’s him on the piano. Can I get you anything to drink while you wait?”

Alec felt a rising frustration, but pushed it down as violently as he could. He ordered a beer, not trusting himself to navigate a mixed drink without Magnus and not looking to get drunk on scotch again, but needing to blend in while he waited.

He activated some runes for better hearing and sight as covertly as possible. He didn’t know who else might be here and he couldn’t risk getting ambushed. 

When his beer came he turned on his stool to get a good look at this supposed devil. It was easier to see him than he had thought on first look since the bar was much higher up than the middle of the floor. 

He was a thin dark haired man. He looked normal to Alec’s eyes, but his playing was…. Something else. He could feel his pain in his voice, his piano skills riviling and maybe even beating Jace on a good day. He looked tired and sad and it reminded Alec of his own pain.

He had to close his eyes to keep the tears at bay. His fingers tracing his engagement ring over and over. As he listened he was unable to keep the memories away. The first time Magnus had showed him his cat eyes and been so afraid Alec wouldn’t find them the most beautiful thing in the world, that first date where Alec had been so scared that he wasn’t good enough for Magnus, wasn’t experienced enough, Magnus telling him how he’d almost jumped off a bridge and only Camille had brought him back, Alec himself almost throwing himself off Magnus’s balcony at Max’s rune party the guilt eating him alive, Magnus almost dying after his magic transfusion, with Alec powerless to do anything, Alec breaking his heart to make him whole, the disastrous engagement, the one that had started well and ended with Magnus leaving…

It took a moment for Alec to realize that the music had stopped. 

He slammed his eyes open and saw that everyone had left, only two women down by the piano with… Lucifer... and himself, even the bartender having slipped out at some point. 

Alec grit his teeth and threw back a gulp of beer before setting it on the bar and moving closer. He could easily hear the blonde woman talking. “I’m just worried about you Lucifer. You’ve missed your last two sessions and with everything going on with Chloe, I just don’t think it’s healthy for you.”

Lucifer took a breath and opened his mouth to reply when the other woman cut him off. “It seems we have company.”

Alec didn’t see her throw it, but a knife flew up from their little group in his direction. With his sight enhancement rune activated he managed to see it coming and dodged just in time, pulling out a seraph blade from his thigh holster to meet the woman’s own blade. 

The two blades made a sick sizzling noise as they met and Alec was quick to push himself to the side, not wanting to see what would happen to his seraph blade after prolonged contact. 

They found themselves on opposite sides of a small table. Alec keeping an eye on her as he circled himself around the side, aiming to put the couch on the next level down between them. She was wearing even more leather than him in an outfit that Izzy would be jealous of and she was grinning when she pulled out a second knife that was curled in the same crescent shape as the first. She even sounded excited when she spoke. “Well, well, well, you actually feel like you can put up something of a fight! It’s been ages since I’ve had a challenge.”

Alec saw her take an extra step forward when he managed to take the step down he was aiming for. He recognized it as the defensive move it was and took his chance to finally speak up. “I’m not here for a fight! I’m here for a favor.”

A loud bang of a piano cover being thrown down sounded to Alec’s right. He didn’t look away. A voice he recognized as the piano player’s spoke up. “Who do you think you are? Demanding a favor. I rarely do any favors these days.”

Alec practically bared his teeth in frustration when the woman took another step. This time Alec didn’t keep backing up. “Someone with very little left to lose. I’m not going anywhere until you hear me out, I don’t care who I have to take down.”

The woman’s grin turned a little more genuine. “I like your spunk. I doubt you know who you’re challenging. I’m Hell’s best torturer. You don’t stand a chance.”

Alec knew that made her a demon, maybe even a mid to greater one. He quickly ran through his internal knowledge as he pulled out a second seraph blade. He wasn’t as good with dual wielding as some, preferring both his arrows and a bow staff over seraph blades, but he would need two to block both of the demon’s. 

A name popped into his head and he tightened his grip. When he spoke it came out like a hiss. “Mazikeen. Daughter of Lilith. I’m surprised I didn’t see you in New York already, your mother was in town.”

Mazikeen’s face blanked in shock. She stood up straight from her fighting position. “Excuse me? What did you just say?”

“ENOUGH! Both of you!”

Mazikeen scoffed and pocketed her blades. Moving back toward Lucifer and the other woman who was talking to him. Alec tracked her all the way back with his eyes before he straightened up and deactivated his seraph blades to put them away. 

Everyone at the piano was looking at him. Mazikeen with curiosity, the blonde woman with a bit of shock and fear, and Lucifer with barely repressed anger. He ran a hand through his hair. This wasn’t how he wanted to start negotiations. 

He was careful to stop a good few feet away from the group. With a fight seemingly tabled for the moment he could feel his exhaustion creep back over him. Maybe he should have just let the demon get a hit in if it put him in a better place. 

Lucifer sighed before he addressed him. “Are you going to tell us who you are now or do I actually need to kick you out?”

Alec stood up straighter. “My name is Alexander Gideon Lightwood, head of the New York Institute of Shadowhunters. I go by Alec. Like I said before, I need a favor.”

Lucifer stood up and came around the piano. From closer up Alec could see that his white shirt was crumpled looking and rolled up to his elbows, his collar messed up like he had been wearing a tie and ripped it off, but he moved with the same kind of grace that Magnus did when he was trying to impress a client and when he sat on the couch to Alec’s right he did it like he knew he owned the place, his legs crossing elegantly and his arms draping over the back to give the illusion he was opening himself up. 

Both Mazikeen and the other woman moved to sit on the end of the couch, out of reach of his arms, but close enough to show support. Alec noticed that Mazikeen shot a look at the blonde like she wanted her to leave but didn’t dare say anything. 

Seeing Lucifer on the couch like that conjured an image of the first time he’d seen Magnus, before they’d actually met, when he was in his club surrounded by those people, most likely other downworlders, because his eyes had been out. Alec had to squeeze his own eyes closed to banish the image. 

It was clear that every eye in the room had caught it and Alec cursed himself internally for being weak. 

Lucifer sighed and brought his hands together as if in prayer under his chin. “I’m not dealing with a nephilim by myself. Amenadial can very well help.”

Alec only had time to widen his eyes in shock at the name before there was a flutter and a large black man appeared in the room only a couple feet away. Alec was quick to drop to one knee in supplication, his hand fisted over his heart and his eyes averted. He couldn’t believe that Lucifer would just casually summon an actual angel. 

“What. What is going on Luci? Who is this man?” 

Alec chanced a glance up and saw that the Amenadial was turned toward Lucifer who was rolling his eyes, Mazikeen looked like she was snickering. The blonde woman caught his eye and actually smiled in sympathy. 

Lucifer sounded put out when he responded. “This, brother, is one of Raziel’s nephilim soldiers. He says he wants a favor and mentioned that Lilith, of all demons, had been in New York. I refuse to deal with him by myself.”

It was Amenadiel’s turn to roll his eyes. He turned back toward Alec. “Excuse my brother’s rudeness. Uh, you may rise. I’ve been living among mortals for a long time, I’m not sure I deserve the bowing.”

Alec was slow to get up. He was still expecting some sort of attack for it. When he did manage to stand at full height , he found he was actually about an inch taller than Amenadiel. He almost cringed when he noticed, sure that that had to be blasphemous somehow, and considering his other sins….

Amenadiel sighed a bit at his caution and moved to sit on the edge of the couch on the other side of Lucifer than Mazikeen and the blonde women. He gestured for Alec to sit on one of the couches opposite them. “You should sit. If Lilith is involved this is probably going to take a while.”

Alec carefully perched on the end of the couch opposite that was closest to Amenadiel. Not because he trusted him more than any of the others, but because he was anticipating him being the most trouble and he wanted to be prepared. If anything was against the will of the angels it was what he wanted, what he was. He found himself playing with his engagement ring at the thought. His mother’s words from when he first kissed Magnus running through his head.  _ For a man? And a downworlder at that!? _

He didn’t regret anything. He made sure to meet Amenadiel’s eyes just to prove he could. Amenadiel just raised an eyebrow.

Lucifer broke the weird atmosphere. “Well, go on then, I don’t have all night you know. Why are you here to get a favor from the devil hmm?”

Alec thought of Magnus. He met Lucifer’s stare. “I need to get into Edom before Lilith kills my fiance and reopens a rift in the sky that’s right over Alicante.”

Lucifer let out a low hiss that almost sounded like a what, while Mazikeen sucked in an audible breath. Amenadiel simply blinked a couple times in apparent shock. 

After a second when no one said anything Alec felt his barely erected walls crumbling around his heart. This was his last chance. He hadn’t even gotten to kiss Magnus goodbye before he’d…

Before Alec could control it, he could feel his eyes watering. His voice when he spoke was thick with his obvious desperation. “Please, please say you can help me. I’ll give you anything you want in exchange. I can’t leave him alone down there. I love him more than anything, more than the clave, more than my own life or happiness. He said he was your family.”

Alec bowed his head in both supplication and as a way to hide the tears now slipping down his face, so he couldn’t see their reactions. 

He was so deep in his own desperation that he didn’t notice anyone approach him until he felt a hand on his arm. When he brought his head up, he could see it was the small blonde woman. Her voice was gentle when she spoke to him. “I know I’m not really involved in this, but my name is Dr. Linda Martin, you can call me Linda. How long has your fiance been gone? Can you tell me that?”

Alec couldn’t stop the tears flowing down his face but he tried to pay attention. “Uh, almost a month now, I think, if I have the date right.”

Linda was frowning in concern. “Alright. Can you tell me the last time you slept?”

Alec threw his mind back. He hadn’t slept since he’d been in LA, to intent on tracking Lucifer, but he had passed out at Magnus’s desk for a couple hours right before he’d woken up and found the file. “I passed out in the study while looking for information… four days ago? I still had my stamina rune activated so it wasn’t for more than a couple hours.”

Linda’s frown was getting deeper. “What about the last time you ate?”

All the thinking was allowing Alec to calm down a bit and stop crying. He took a couple breaths and ran a hand down his face. “I think Max brought me a couple sandwiches when I first got here, before I started the leg work, I don’t remember if I ate them but I must have, that was three days ago.”

Linda’s lips were a thin line now. “And nephilim, what exactly are they- you?”

Alec swallowed heavily. “You’re a mundane.”

“Excuse me?” Linda sounded a little offended. 

Alec waved a hand a little absently. “A regular human.”

“And you aren’t?”

“Nephilim are humans with angel blood. We’re raised from infancy to protect mundanes from demons and rouge downworlders. Eh, vampires, werewolves, seelie, and…. Warlocks.” Alec started strong, but trailed off when he named warlocks.

Linda’s eyes were wide. “There are actual werewolves and vampires? I thought it was only the biblical stuff?”

Alec actually gave a half smile. “All legends are true. Vampires and werewolves are humans that were infected with certain demon diseases that changed their physiology. Seelie are beings born of angels and demons. And Warlocks are the children of a demon and a human.”

“And you’re the head of some sort of institute? Aren’t you only like… 24ish? Or do you not age?” Linda’s eyes seemed to be boring into his and Alec wasn’t sure how this was relevant but it didn’t really matter at this point.

“Yeah I’m 23. We age and die like humans. The only real difference is our ability to use angelic runes. We burn them on our bodies with a steele and we gain abilities from them like strength and agility. If a normal human did it they’d go crazy and possibly die. My family has run the New York institute for my whole life and when my parents had to… give it up, I got the leadership position. I’ve been on active duty for 11 years and running the institute as a second for about three before I got the job. I’m qualified.”

Linda blinked a couple times. “You… hunt and kill demons and such and you start when exactly? You’re 23 and have been on active duty for 11 years?”

Alec blinked at her a couple times, not sure what the problem was. “We finish the main training course and become eligible for missions after we take the angelic rune at 12. My baby brother just got his a few months ago. He’s on active duty in LA right now actually.”

Linda’s eyes widened drastically. “That’s using child soldiers! That’s awful!”

Mazikeen scoffed loudly from the other couch. “What’s the big deal? If they were raised for it it’s fine right?”

Linda turned to look sternly at Mazikeen. “Maze. They age like humans. Are mortal like humans. 12 is only about a year older than Trixie.”

A weird look crossed both Maze’s and Lucifer’s faces at the comparison. Maze let out a “Well damn.”

Alec squared his shoulders. “It’s all I’ve ever known. Training and fighting and watching my comrades die around me for the clave. I grew up having to be the perfect son. I was the oldest and I had to look out for my siblings, take any heat we got from our parents. Izzy has too much of a free spirit and runs around with downworlders, sleeping with seelies, Jace came from an even more broken home, he didn’t even know how to be around people when my parents adopted him. It’s my job to protect them, to make sure someone paid attention to Izzy when mom ignored her or belittled her abilities even as she became a great warrior and the best forensic pathologist in New York. To work with Jace until he became my parabatai, never mind I was half in love with him at the time, and be prepared to get blamed for his mistakes because he’s my parents favorite despite him not even being theirs. I repressed everything about myself to help everyone around me until I met Magnus. I’d be miserable and in the closet and married to a woman I didn’t love if I hadn’t met him. He’s done everything for me since I met him. It’s my fault he’s where he is now and I need to get him back.”

Amenadiel looked sad as he talked, like he understood, but as Alec went on Lucifer perked up more and more. Alec shot him a look. Lucifer stared back with wide eyes. “Did you just say Magnus? Magnus Bane? Are you saying he’s your fiance?!”

Alec smiled for the first time since he got there, a real smile, though he kept shooting sideways looks at Amenadiel as he answered, he kept his main focus on Lucifer. “Yeah. Magnus Bane, former High Warlock of Brooklyn. Asmodeus’s son. I love him more than anything.”

Lucifer let out a sharp laugh. “You’re telling me a Shadowhunter is planning on marrying my nephew?! How on Earth are you not stripped of your runes much less a head of institute still!? Bad enough in your repressed society for you to be dating a man I can’t imagine their reaction to a male warlock!”

Alec kept smiling at the memory. “They weren’t happy I can tell you. I got together with Magnus when he crashed my wedding and I left Lydia at the altar to kiss him in front of the entire clave, including my parents and friends. I hadn’t even breathed the word gay before then. Hell we hadn’t gone on a date yet, I’d never dated anyone else. It’s like we saw each other and knew we were meant to be. We had the Inquisitor all over our institute and then she gave the leadership position to Jace before he gave it back. It was a whole mess. I probably would have gotten in much more trouble if we hadn’t been in an emergency situation basically ever since. The worst of it was from my parent’s. I can still hear my mom from right after. ‘You cost this institute everything, and for what?! A man and a downworlder at that!’ Then it was, ‘So I hear you like to drink Magnus’, and so on. She’s much better now that she’s not a Shadowhunter anymore.”

Lucifer grinned. “Is that why you’ve been shooting Amenadiel looks like you expect him to kill you since he showed up? You think he’s going to smite you for being engaged to a male warlock?”

Amenadiel looked back and forth between Alec and Lucifer. “I would never smite anyone just because of who they love! What kind of angel would do that?”

Lucifer and Alec spoke in unison. “Raziel.”

They looked at each other and Lucifer smirked. “Well apparently. He’s the one that gave all the Shadowhunter’s his blood so they could fight ‘evil’ and whatnot. All of their original rules were his. Although if I’m not mistaken there were no warlocks at the time. So… “

Amenadiel turned to look Alec straight in the face. “Some angels are more judgemental than others. I’d say if God hasn’t interfered himself maybe you should take it with a grain of sand. That’s something I’ve spent the last couple years learning myself.”

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “It’s salt brother, take it with a grain of salt.”

Amenadiel scoffed. “Does it really matter?”

Lucifer leaned forward toward Alec, dismissing the conversation with his brother. “Magnus is my favorite nephew, I haven’t seen him in century’s. If he’s in trouble I’m definitely interested. If Lilith is involved I’m doubly so. Besides, I could use the distraction. SO, if you would tell us how this happened so we could be getting on with it that’d be good.”

Alec huffed a sigh, not really sure how to start. Everything had really started when Clary found out about the shadow world and snowballed from there, but he was sure it wasn’t all relevant. “Well, it’s a long story, but it starts with a rogue shadowhunter named Valentine Morgensturn.”

Lucifer interrupted in an offended tone. “Morgensturn!? That sounds like a bastardized version of Morningstar and I’ll tell you right now I’ve never had anything to do with Shadowhunters, they’re all far too far up themselves to be any fun.”

Alec gave a weak shrug. “The family claims to have some weak connection to you. In fact your sword features a bit in the story.”

Lucifer grimaced at the mention of his sword. “Just, get on with it then I guess. I’m sure I’ll love hearing THIS sordid tale.”

Alec cleared his throat. “Well, he became obsessed with killing all downworlders whether they had done anything or not, and in his quest to do so he started experimenting. He had two kids by way of his wife and stole a third from the dead body of an enemy of his. His first child was a boy named Johnathan. He thought if he could inject him with demon blood while he was still in the womb he’d become a stronger soldier. But he didn’t want to contaminate his kid with just any blood, so he summoned Lilith herself to ask for some. She ended up agreeing because she’s obsessed with having children.”

Maze was the one to interrupt with a scoff. “She has plenty of children, including me. She never seemed interested in us before.”

Alec would never understand Lilith. He just shrugged again. “Maybe she wanted human children? I don’t know. The day I understand that bitch is the day I kill myself.”

“Well that’s morbid, you must really hate her!” Lucifer sounded weirdly chipper.

Linda jumped in before Alec could continue the story. “What did he do to the other two children?”

Alec gave Linda a half-smile at the thought of Jace and Clary, but made sure he looked over at Amenadiel when he talked about it. “We’re still not sure how, but he managed to summon and capture an angel, Ithuriel. He injected Jace, my parabatai, with his blood after he stole him and raised him in secret while glamoured as another shadowhunter. He staged his own death when Jace was about 11 so he could disappear as Valentine and that’s when my family adopted him. When his wife got pregnant a second time with a girl he used the same method as Jace, but was able to inject her before she was born. He was run off and thought dead several months before Clary’s actual birth.”

Amenadiel looked grim at the news. “Is that why Ithuriel’s been missing? What happened to him?”

Alec met Amenadiel’s eyes with a deep frown. “Clary and Jace freed him from Valentine. But he was killed by Lilith a few months later when he was visiting Clary.” Alec saw the question on everyone’s face and made a jabbing gesture with his arm. “I wasn’t there, but Clary said she just shoved her arm and hand threw the back of his chest and took out his heart. I’m sorry for your loss. He was a great help to two close friends of mine.”

The rage on Lucifer’s face was terrifying. “It is the greatest crime imaginable to kill an angel. Keep telling us the story, we clearly need to make this right.”

Alec sighed. “Valentine ended up sending Johnathan to Edom to be with Lilith after he’d killed another shadowhunter boy at about 11. He reasoned that he was too dangerous to keep around. Lilith spent years torturing him until he managed to get topside a couple years ago. Valentine convinced him to help him and Jace killed him. But when he died he somehow managed to summon Lilith up to New York. We didn’t know it was her at the time, we just thought it was an Edom entrance that was spewing random wraith demons. Magnus- Magnus closed it for us even though we were separated and me and my sister led the extermination effort against the wraith demons. While Jace and Clary went after Valentine.”

He remembered like it was yesterday how much it meant to him that Magnus had agreed to close the portal for them. He wasn’t sure what they would have done without him. He also remembered what he’d said to Magnus when they got back together.  _ I don’t think I can live without you.  _ He wasn’t wrong. 

Alec closed his eyes in pain for a second before he continued. “Raziel left the Shadowhunter’s a way to summon him in the event of an emergency to ask for one favor. You need the three mortal instruments. Valentine had them and Clary and Jace went to stop him. He killed Jace. Clary killed him before he could make the wish and used the wish to bring Jace back to life.”

Alec’s hand drifted down to his parabatai rune. “I felt him die myself. A piece of me died with him.” His voice softened. “I kind of hated Clary before that. She’d come into our world and turned it upside down. But she was willing to do anything to bring my parabatai back at the expense of everything. I can’t thank her enough, no matter what happened later.”

Linda set a hand on his arm again. Her voice was soft when she spoke. “What  _ is  _ a parabatai? You’ve mentioned it a few times now.”

Alec lifted his shirt so that everyone could see his parabatai rune. 

_ “Entreat me not to leave thee, _

_ Or return from following after thee— _

_ For whither thou goest, I will go, _

_ And where thou lodgest, I will lodge. _

_ Thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God.  _

_ Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried.  _

_ The Angel do so to me, and more also, _

_ If aught but death part thee and me.” _

Alec spoke it softly, but no one tried to speak over him. “It’s an ancient oath that connects two people. I have part of Jace’s soul and he has part of mine. It’s a warrior bond. It’s rare even in shadowhunter society to find yours. Me and Jace took the oath in front of the council when we were 16.” Alec gave a sharp laugh. “I thought I was giving up my whole life at the time. Jace was the first person I ever had feelings for, but parabatai are forbidden from forming a romantic bond. I got over it though. Jace and I are true brothers now. I don’t regret it.”

Linda frowned at him. “So when you say you felt him die, you really  _ felt _ him die?”

Alec dropped his shirt and frowned. “Yeah. Some of the worst pain I’d ever felt. I can never thank Clary enough for bringing him back. But that’s where the real problems started, to be honest. Jace didn’t come back quite right. It took a long time to figure out what was wrong because his mother was severely mentally ill before she died. Jace thought he was going crazy.”

Linda made a derisive noise next to him. “I don’t suppose you Shadowhunters have a good mental health program like you’d need to help child soldiers?”

Alec smiled sadly. “Shadowhunters have a saying, emotions cloud judgment. We have a couple runes that can help and a special sect of shadowhunters that don’t fight called the silent brothers. They collect shadowhunter secrets. Sometimes they can help. But if you’re found to have a mental disease you’ll get taken off duty or possibly stripped of your runes. Hunting demons is the only purpose we have. A lot of time it’s not worth getting the help if it means stopping the hunt.”

Lucifer cut in abruptly. “Yes this is all very sad and whatnot, but what happened with Lilith? Get on with it, really now.”

Alec swallowed hard. “When Jace was resurrected he was vulnerable to Lilith, letting her possess him. She used him as a tool to go out into the world and possess more mundanes. She needed 33 to bring Johnathan back. She worked by infecting his dreams and subconscious. Making him think he was killing Clary everytime he closed his eyes. He loved her so much though it was periodically breaking him out of Lilith’s control. Lilith- Lilith went to Magnus.”

Alec paused to take a breath and clenched his hands together hard. If he’d only been there with Magnus. He’d- what? Have recognized Lilith when even Magnus hadn’t? A sense of uselessness washed over him. His nail’s dug into his palms until they hurt while Alec wished for a punching bag. Linda reached over and grabbed his hand right before he broke skin. 

It broke Alec out of his thoughts and he whipped his head around to look at her. She smiled gently. “I doubt Magnus would want you to hurt yourself over him.”

Alec only just managed to blink back his tears again. His voice was thick when he talked. “Even if he didn’t I’d deserve it. We haven’t even gotten to what I did yet.” Alec cleared his throat to continue before anyone else could say anything. “She told him she was a warlock and needed help making a potion that would make someone fall out of love with her because he was a mortal soldier and it was hurting him. Distracting him.” Alec barked out a sharp laugh. “Magnus always did have a thing for soldiers. Once she gave him the potion he fell completely under, he even dropped Clary off a building. Clary gave herself over to the guard so we could capture him before the clave killed him. Me and Izzy tried going inside his mind to drag him out with Magnus’s help, but Lilith broke in and got him back. Oh, angel, I’ll never forget his face.”

Alec put his head in his hands. “He begged me and Izzy to kill him for what he’d done. He said he’d rather die than go back to Lilith, but we dragged him out anyway. Promised we’d keep him safe. I couldn’t live with myself after we lost him. That’s why I let Magnus go the first time. I couldn’t let my parabatai suffer again. It was let Magnus go and maybe we saved him, or keep Magnus safe and kill my parabatai with my own two hands.”

Linda put an arm around Alec’s shoulders. Alec sucked in a wet breath and looked back up at Lucifer and the other’s. “None of the other warlock’s would help give Magnus the magic he needed to break the possession because they were forbidden by the new High Warlock of Brooklyn on threat of being sentenced to the dungeons of the spiral labyrinth. But Magnus was determined to help because he thought it was his fault. So he sent himself to Edom to bargain with his father and I kissed him goodbye and let him go. I let him go because I couldn’t kill my parabatai when he’d asked me to.”

Lucifer sucked in a breath through his teeth. “Well, I doubt that went well. Asmodeus is notoriously hard to deal with. What exactly did the smug bastard ask for? Nothing good I’m assuming.”

“Asmodeus gave Magnus a temporary power boost at the price of Magnus’s own power and immortality.” Alec did his best to keep eye contact. “ Magnus became a mundane essentially. He even lost his-his eyes.”

Maze growled in the back of her throat. “What became of Lilith. I doubt she liked you stealing her minion.”

Alec scoffed. “I was severely injured with an arrow head lodged in my chest, courtesy of a possessed Jace, so I wasn’t there, but the Seelie Queen gave a friend of mine who’s a vamp a mark that blasted her back to Edom. She still managed to resurrect Johnathan though and use an ancient twinning rune to connect him and Clary.” Alec suddenly remembered something and snapped his head around to Lucifer. “Actually, you’re very familiar with this rune considering you were the last one to have it. Found a book that said it connected you and Michael before you fell.”

Lucifer pulled an awful face at that. “Oh, that abomination. A last attempt by dear old Dad to get me to behave. It was worth letting Michael stab me to get that thing off, even if it did lead to my fall. How on earth did you get it off? I’m assuming you did or you’d be asking for help with that too.”

Alec twirled his ring and wished he could get back to talking about Magnus, not sure how these celestial beings would take talks about their swords being wielded by mortals. He didn’t want the distraction. But he supposed that if it got them to help. 

“Micheal’s sword got blown to bits when he used it to stab you. We found out the clave had managed to find a piece of it. They had broken it into nanoparticules to create a serum that would burn the demon blood out of downworlders and turn them into mundanes. My sister ran an operation to shut them down and steal at least some of their serum to inject Clary and a captured Johnathan with. It didn’t end up working so my sister, uh, well. She refined it and reforged the sword using adamis and angel blood. Jace stabbed Clary’s rune and separated them.”

Both Amenadiel and Lucifer stood up from the couch in surprise. Amenadiel managed to drown out Lucifer. “You reforged Michael’s holy sword!? With angel blood!?”

It took everything in Alec to stay seated. His hand twitched for his seraph blade as Linda abruptly scooted away a good foot, almost jumping to her feet herself. Lucifer hissed at Alec once Amenadiel was done yelling. “You brought that sword back to the human realm! Angelic relics are meant to stay away from mortals!” 

Alec kept his voice steady when he answered, not wanting to raise tensions even more. “The fight wasn’t in the mortal realm, it was in the Seelie realm in the Wandering Woods, and as soon as Jace stabbed Clary it burst into a thousand pieces again just like the first time, so we don’t even still have it. And yes we used angel blood. But it’s not like we had an angel on call. Simon was dying and drank Jace’s blood that had been enhanced with injections of Ithuriel’s blood. Since not even Jace was there Izzy used Simon’s blood.”

Amenadiel sounded incredulous. “You restored Micheal’s sword with VAMPIRE blood!?”

Lucifer burst into laughter and fell back onto the couch. Amenadiel groaned and also sat back down, his head in his hands. 

Alec looked at Amenadiel in concern, but decided he probably wasn’t going to kill Alec right now. 

Lucifer’s laughter was finally dying down and he managed to speak through his random chuckles. “Well to be honest it sounds like you people had things well in hand. What changed hmm?”

Alec got quiet and stared down at his hands. He saw Magnus convulsing on his office floor again in his mind. When Alec spoke it was soft and distant. “Magnus tried to convince me and everyone else that he was fine without his magic. But he really wasn’t. He felt useless and awful in a dangerous time, managing to get kidnapped by another warlock. He decided he couldn’t live as a mundane and went to the new High Warlock who hated him, Lorenzo Rey. He traded his apartment that he’d lived in for almost a hundred years for a magic transfusion from him. But Magnus’s body rejected the transfusion. He ended up bleeding and dying on the floor of my office. His friend Catirina managed to save him, but he needed the transfusion undone and if you undo a magic transfusion you can’t get one again. I begged Lorenzo to take it back and he agreed. Magnus didn’t want it undone at first. I had to plead with him. I couldn’t handle seeing him dying like that. I couldn’t-”

Alec choked as the memories consumed him. “I knew after that that I couldn’t lose him, that he was it for me and I never wanted to live without him. So I planned to propose. But he showed up to dinner drunk and upset. He didn’t feel whole. So I- I couldn’t just leave it like that. Leave Magnus to suffer. I did something desperate.”

Alec felt Linda moved back toward him and put a hand back on his shoulder. But Alec couldn’t take it this time. He gently moved Linda’s hand off his shoulder and down to the couch. She made a noise that Alec also ignored, just wanting to be done talking now. 

“I used a medium to talk to Asmodeus. He told me that he would give Magnus back what belonged to him, his magic and immortality, if I broke his heart. He said I wasn’t good enough for his son. I had to break up with him and never, ever tell him why. So that night I told him I couldn’t handle his breakdowns, that the spark I’d fallen in love with had left for good. He kissed me and begged me to stay, over and over, that he had nothing if I left, but I still walked out the door. I left him alone.”

Maze let out a low whistle. “Well, that sounds like someone who’s good at torture right there. Gotta admire that at least.”

Alec had his seraph blades pulled back out before he even knew he was moving. Maze had managed to jump up into a crouching move on the couch to get the high ground on him and pull out her own blades in the same movement, meeting Alec in a clash and a sizzle. Alec pulled back to renew his attack and Maze back-flipped over the sofa. 

Maze was grinning a bloodthirsty grin again as she spun her blades. “So we are gonna fight after all, this is gonna be fun angel-boy.”

Alec breathed heavily and used the time Maze was giving him to use his steele to activate his agility, strength, and speed runes. He heard a gasp behind him from Linda as they lit up. He stashed his steele and spun his seraph blades to get a better grip on them. “Don’t talk like that again. Not when it concerns Magnus.”

Maze growled in her throat. “I dare you to try.”

Alec wasn’t sure if Lucifer was going to interfere, but he took the chance he wasn’t to follow Maze’s lead and jump up on the couch, using it to launch himself into a forward flip up to the next level, aiming a slash for her head. Maze ducked out of the way and used the movement to back toward the stairs. Alec could tell she was heading to the biggest patch of clear floor in front of the wall. When Alec landed he used the momentum to slide a leg out to offset Maze’s balance as well as ducking the blade aimed at his own torso. 

Maze jumped over Alec’s leg and up onto the next stair. Alec didn’t have much room, but he managed a roll to Maze’s other side, slashing at her thigh. He was met with Maze’s blade in a rain of sparks, only just getting his second one up to block the one coming at his head. She disengaged to take the next step up into the open floor, doing a backflip in an effort to prevent his standing up right away. Alec managed to get to his feet anyway, but her foot got his hand and his left blade went flying. 

Alec adjusted to grip his one blade with both hands and circled around the back of the white couch from the lower level to reassess. Now that they were reassessing he could hear the comments from the others. Linda kept letting out breathy exclamation’s, while Lucifer sounded like he was having fun cheering Maze on. Amenadiel kept groaning in defeat. 

The only information Alec really cared about was the knowledge that no one sounded like they were going to stop the two of them. He grinned. He didn’t want to kill her, but it would make him feel a lot better to draw some blood. 

He wondered what color ichor she’d bleed. 

He dropped his shorter seraph blade and kicked it while pulling out his full sword length one in a single motion. Maze saw his intentions and and lunged while she thought he was unbalanced. Alec managed to duck the blow and aim a counterattack at her shins as he moved past her, but Maze spun out of the way until they had switched positions. 

Maze and him came together again, Maze only just able to keep Alec’s heavier weapon away from her, her right-handed blade sliding up to the tip of Alec’s sword, the left she managed to pull back just enough to push the blade into Alec’s hand instead of the bottom of the sword. 

It burned like no other regular blade and Alec twisted, kicking her away with his left foot as he used the momentum from the twisting to wrench his sword to the right, taking Maze’s blade with him where was embedded in his hand, forcing her to let go or be caught by Alec’s sword.

Maze took a direct hit from Alec’s kick and ended up crouched with one blade in front of the wall of mirrors. Alec kept a solid hold on his sword until he’d retreated to the right far enough where he could let go with his left hand long enough to rip the curved blade out. His blood was soaking the hilt, but Alec did his best to ignore it. He made sure he tossed the blade behind him, instead of anywhere near Maze. 

Maze was clearly angry now, and rushed him, aiming low. Alec got both hands on the hilt in time to block it, and managed to swing the other end up and knock her in the face with the hilt. It jarred her, but also hit his injured hand, causing Alec to let go and the sword to fling out behind him over the white couch. 

The hit had pushed Maze off her feet and Alec was quick to jump on her to keep her down. Maze immediately stabbed into his left bicep, going deeper with Alec’s own force. Alec wrapped his hands around her throat and she punched him in the face. Alec felt blood fill his mouth and spit over her shoulder while shifting his weight so his knees helped block her hands. He moved so only his left arm was over her throat so he could get a good punch in with his bleeding right. 

The right hook cut her cheek, but all Alec could see was red blood. It distracted him for a second and let Maze swing her legs around to kick him onto his left side. It jostled the blade in his shoulder, hitting it out and flying across the floor. Alec made his first noise of pain when he smacked the injury against the floor. 

Maze pinned him in a painful position, his arrow’s digging into his spine. He huffed and rolled his eyes. “Alright already, I yield. I got enough hits in to get you back.”

Maze smiled razor sharp. “If you weren’t gay I’d take you right here on this floor.”

Alec’s face twisted up in disgust. “Please don’t.”

Maze just smiled sharper and jumped off of him. Alec sat up slowly, his bloody hand coming up to cover his equally bloody left shoulder. He let himself sit for a second to feel the burning pain. When he looked back up at Maze she actually had a hand out to help him up. Alec gave a tilted smile and grabbed her wrist as best he could with his injured hand. Maze was quick to grab his wrist and help lever him up, Alec grit his teeth, but got up well enough. 

When Alec looked over at the couches again he saw that Linda looked shocked, and Amenadiel and Lucifer had turned around to watch them, Lucifer actually clapping now with a smile on his face. Amenadiel was wearing a look that was somewhere between pained and impressed. 

Alec sighed and rolled his eyes as he started walking back down to his former spot. “Just so you all know in case you get any ideas, I’m  _ not  _ the best close range fighter. I’m okay but I prefer my arrows. Jace probably would have won for instance.”

Maze was emphatic in her enthusiasm. “Sweet! Humans get so boring.”

Lucifer smirked. “Wasn’t he the one with extra angel blood?”

Alec scoffed. “Yeah but all that does is let him activate his runes without tracing them if he concentrates. I put it down to his training with Valentine when he was young, but don’t tell him I said that, he doesn’t like to bring that up. Izzy’s probably better than me too, being the weapons master and all, but it’s been awhile since we’ve spared. But I will tell you I took down friggin’ Azazel with my bow so, don’t think this means anything.”

Linda’s eyes followed him as he sat next to her on the couch, giving her plenty of room. Maze threw herself back in her seat despite her clear injuries. She was still smiling. “How would your tiny brother do? You said he’s an active hunter now, what’s he specialize in?”

Alec grunted, only half paying attention as he took off his bow and arrows. “Max is an okay fighter, Izzy said he likes throwing weapons, throwing daggers and ninja stars and such. But he’s better with the stuff that needs a brain. Best tracker in his group, and quick with runes. He’s been training under dad since his surgery so he might end up with less field time and more leadership duties.”

“Surgery!” The word practically burst from Linda’s mouth.

Alec stopped taking his jacket off with his bloody left sleeve still on to look at Linda. His face was grim. “Yeah. He got knocked out by Seb-Johnathan when he was still undercover. Magnus couldn’t do anything to help, the silent brothers had to basically reboot his brain. We weren’t sure if he was going to make it. But he came out fine, he just needs glasses now.”

Alec swallowed a mouth full of blood and kept peeling out of his jacket. 

Amenadiel cut into the silence that had fallen strangely over the group. “Now that you and Maze are done attacking each other, would you mind telling us the rest of your situation so that we can figure out what we’re doing?”

Alec looked at his stab wound instead of looking at Amenadiel’s face, which he was sure was filled with sympathy. The wound was pretty deep, but he was more concerned with the strange black marks coming off of it. 

He must have spent too long looking at it because Maze sighed dramatically and stormed off behind the bar, coming back with a large white box with a red cross on it. “Here, first aid kit. Loser gets first dibs. Can we hurry this up before I get bored again?”

Alec sighed and took his shirt off before he turned back to look at Amenadiel and Lucifer. Lucifer has a raised eyebrow and was clearly scanning his torso up and down while Amenadiel was actually meeting his eyes, ignoring his missing shirt. Alec shot a sideways look at Linda to see her reaction and she was just blinking at him. Lucifer drew his attention back when he gave a low whistle. “Well, well, well! At least my nephew has good taste in the looks department. Fighting demons does wonders apparently.”

Alec probably would have blushed before he met Magnus. Almost definitely. Now he just gave a sad smile, the comment just reminding him of Magnus. Amenadiel raised an eyebrow and spoke up. “Ignore him, the rest of the story please.”

Alec pulled out his stele and twisted to trace the rune on his lower left side, behind his parabatai rune. He could feel his wounds starting to heal. He started the end of his story. “After Johnathan got free of Clary he got stronger all at once, sprouted black wings from his back. He took what was said to be your sword that he’d gotten from the seelie queen and flew off toward Alicante.”

Lucifer made a weird croaking noise in his throat and Alec flipped his stele and put it back in his belt, reaching for the first aid kit to get some alcohol pads so he could even see what was going on with his hand. “He can’t possibly have had my actual sword! I broke it into three pieces and threw two of them into an empty alternate universe!”

Alec paused where he had ripped open the first alcohol pad, a tremor he didn’t like now starting in his right hand now that the adrenaline had worn off, and looked up to meet Lucifer’s eyes. “Well maybe it was just a sword made with some portion of your power or a sliver of a different weapon or yours or something. I don’t know. No one had heard about it in years before Johnathan went looking for it. It opens rifts to Edom and only Morgensterns can use it.”

Lucifer’s mouth twisted in a sneer and his eyes glowed with a red burn. “I  _ hate _ when people use my name to cause problems.”

Alec only held his gaze long enough to prove he wasn’t scared of Lucifer’s fire eyes, before going back to his alcohol pad. “We portaled right to the city but he got there shortly after us. We didn’t have time to evacuate the non-fighters. We put up the best fight we could, but we were looking at an endless battle where we were going to die way before we ran out of demons. Especially when half out weapons were designed to banish them back to Edom and we had Edom coming out of the sky. Johnathan broke the sword so that no one could use it to close the rift.”

Alec pressed down on his wound as hard as he could as he remembered what happened next. “Magnus showed up right when I was under attack. He must have killed at least three wraith demons in one blow. He told me he’d gotten rid of Asmodeus somehow and found out what happened and how I was going to ask him to marry me. We got engaged right under the rift. Then he realized he would have to go to Edom and use the magic he got from there to keep the rift closed. I had to just watch him leave because the only alternative was thousands of casualties. Millions. I couldn’t- damn it!”

His nails had slipped over the wipe and straight into his stab wound. “What the fuck kind of blades were those! They were poisoning me, not anymore because of my iratze, but they aren’t healing!”

Linda reached over and took the first aid kit from him, and then his right hand. “Here let me do it before you really hurt yourself.” 

She was much more gentle on him than he ever would have been on himself while she cleaned up the blood. He had lucked out and the blade had hit him in the back of his hand between the bones going to his ring and middle finger. 

Maze was the one to answer him. “They’re blades that were forged in the pits of hell for the purpose of killing other demons and even angels. Anything that doesn’t die by ordinary means these will kill.”

Alec was quiet in his response. “Well, you should show them to Isabelle sometime.”

Maze smirked. “Maybe I will if she’s got your looks and fighting skills.”

Alec made a face as Linda started wrapping his hand. “Please don’t. Unlike me she may take you up on it. I can never tell with her.”

Maze laughed and even Amenadial gave a grudging smile. Only Lucifer didn’t seem amused, still stewing in his anger.

Lucifer spoke abruptly in a tone he’d yet to use since Alec had been there, making Alec sit up straighter from where he’d hunched a bit to give Linda access to his shoulder wound she had started dressing. She hissed out a mild curse he didn’t hear. “Well, you’ve told us your story but I don’t know what you expect me to do about it. Edom is a hell dimension, but it’s not MY hell dimension. No humans belong there. I don’t have the ability to travel there, it’s Asmodeus’s domain, and even if I did the very air is made of the same stuff as demons. I can’t get you there OR keep you alive once you are there!”

Alec frowned in thought, not wincing when Linda pulled his bandage tight. “I’ve got a way to get there. I saved Lorenzo from being a lizard and he owes me now. He can open a portal to Edom. It’s disappointing that you don’t have any way for me to survive down there, but honestly I might have a backup plan for that.”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “So what do you want me to do for you exactly? I’m a busy man, even for my future nephew-in-law.”

Somebody scoffed at that, but Alec wasn’t paying attention to who it was. He was meeting Lucifer’s eyes to show he was serious. “If my plan works and I get into Edom and manage to survive the environment, I still won’t know where in there to find Magnus. I don’t have time to search the whole dimension. We got word right before I left that Lilith plans to wage a war on Magnus to gain control of the portal. She wants to come through and kill Johnathan for betraying her. I can’t go in there alone. I’ll need help. I don't know who else to ask.”

Lucifer opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by Maze. “Let me get this straight. You want to hire someone to go and fetch your future husband. From a hell dimension. A place where there might be untold carnage. AND they might have to fight Lilith?”

Alec made a skeptical face. “Yeees. Essentially.”

Maze smiled. “I accept the job then. This may be my best bounty ever. I’d love nothing more than to have to fight my bitch of a mother.”

Lucifer sighed and rolled his eyes. “Alright, I guess I can help. But you’ll owe me. Probably the biggest favor I’ve ever had cause to collect.”

Amenadiel cleared his throat. “I can’t go into Edom anymore than you can Alec. But I’m not about to let my brother and Maze go to New York and get involved with nephilim unsupervised.”

Linda had sat back in her space once she was done but she put up a hand to interrupt now. “I almost can’t believe it, but I want to go to.”

Alec made a noise in his throat. “Why?”

Linda shot Alec a sideways look. “I want to learn more about the nephilim society, and this seems like a time of great upheaval that calls for a therapist. I am absolutely not touching a hell dimension with a ten foot pole though, don’t worry about that.”

Lucifer stood up with a kind of nervous energy. “Great! Let’s get going then, I’ll grab my coat!”

Linda stood up after him, radiating disapproval. “Lucifer! Absolutely not! This man is in no shape to go anywhere, I’m surprised he’s still conscious! It’ll have to wait until at least tomorrow.”

Alec opened his mouth to protest, but just as he did, he realized that his hearing and sight enhancement runes must have gone out a while ago because his vision was blurring around the edges now. He’d been running on nothing but determination for ages now and the fading adrenaline from his fight must have taken the last of his strength along with it. 

When he did open his mouth, his voice was actually slurring a bit. “That fight may have been a mistake. I’m not sure I can get up.”

Every eye in the room turned toward him in some state of alarm. He found himself tipping forward, and in an effort to catch himself, ended up trying to stand anyway. His legs definitely wouldn’t hold him though, and the last thing he saw was the rug coming way too close to his face. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Sympathy For The Devil?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has my own interpretation of the whole Robert Lightwood/ Micheal Wayland thing. It's mostly canon as far as I can tell, but I haven't read that far in the books. I did make Robert a bit nicer/less homophobic per his shadowhunter show characterization. No I don't like him even in the show though. Cheating is bad. Also shorter chapter than the last one, but this felt like a natural break. I felt like I'd be shoving too much together if I kept going.

Alec came to with a quiet groan, his vision filled with orange. His head was throbbing and buzzing in a way that made it hard for Alec to remember what had happened or where he was. He rolled onto his back and ran a rough hand over his face, only to pull on the bandages wrapped around his dominant hand. 

He stared at the now bloody bandages for a few seconds while the memories of the last few days rolled over him in waves. Alec dropped his bandaged hand over his eyes to hide the fact that they were starting to fill with frustrated tears. 

He couldn’t believe that he’d passed out right when he’d finally secured some help in getting Magnus back. For a second he’d even forgotten that Magnus was gone, half thinking that he’d roll over on this stupid couch he was on and be met with the concerned face of his fiance.

He only allowed himself a moment to get himself together and blink back the last of his burgeoning tears. 

He couldn’t quite get himself to sit all the way up just yet, so he turned as much as he could to get a good look at the room he was in. He had to blink a few times as he looked around to confirm he was really seeing what he was seeing. It looked so much like a room that Magnus would design that it sent a pang right to his heart to see it. 

For now though it seemed like he was alone, so he dug his stele out of his holster and lifted his shirt to activate his iratze again. He had to stay lying there for a bit as he felt the angelic magic wash over him slowly. His body felt less stiff, but still sore and achy and his wounds started to itch a bit around the edges, like they were finally beginning to heal, but the pain in his head only subsided a little. 

Alec sighed at his own stupidity. An iratze usually worked much faster and more completely, it only worked slowly like this when the person receiving it was truly and completely out of energy to give to it. To let himself get like this….

Alec felt a prod from his parabatai rune, like Jace was trying to feel him out. Alec had been blocking anything he was feeling from transferring to Jace since Alec had broken up with Magnus, long before Magnus had entered Edom, the feelings almost too intense for Alec and way more than he felt Jace should be subjected too after the Owl ordeal and everything going on with Clary. 

He hadn’t even noticed that Jace hadn’t sent anything his way either since Magnus left. He must have been trying not to add to Alec’s pain. 

Alec’s passing out must have dropped his walls around his parabatai bond and let everything through. It was no wonder Jace was radiating concern now. Alec tried to send some sort of emotion that would say he was fine, but he couldn’t get himself to feel anything like happiness or content. Jace must have at least felt how weak he was, because the next thing Alec felt was a burst of energy from Jace that immediately flowed to his iratze. The buzzing in his head died down another few degrees, his aches easing slightly, and he could feel the edges of his wound pull together a bit before it stopped and he was left with just more intense itching. 

It made Alec feel steady enough to sit up and swing his legs over the edge of the couch. 

Now that he could see the whole room his eyes immediately zeroed in on the doors to the balcony and suddenly all he could think of was some fresh air. He stumbled to his feet, his shin hitting the coffee table as he tried to gain his footing. 

When he got the door open he was hit by a blast of cool air and felt better. He folded his arms on the railing and inhaled as he took in the view of LA. Jace must have even felt the difference, because Alec felt something like caring through the bond before Jace faded back out, clearly coming to the conclusion that Alec was fine again. 

The view was different from the view from Magnus’s balcony, but it  _ felt  _ familiar in a way that nothing had recently. He could almost feel Magnus standing beside him as he looked out and it gave him a sense of calm and rationality that he’d been missing for a while now. 

Now that he had himself back together he could feel just how far apart he had come since Magnus left. It felt like he’d come out of a panic attack that had lasted for weeks. A mania that Alec was barely keeping from exploding out of him. 

His emotions had been all over the place for…. For so long now. Starting way before Magnus left. With Jace getting possessed and Magnus losing his magic. Alec kept going from feeling wrecked to eleated. Losing Jace, getting him back, Magnus losing his magic, Magnus dying, proposing, breaking up, getting engaged, losing him….

Alec had felt alone in a distant way he hadn’t felt in a while. He didn’t dare lean on Jace when he’d been through so much, didn’t know how to even begin leaning on Izzy when she’d watched Jace and then Clary go through everything right next to him. and Magnus… He wanted so much to be there for Magus he’d put aside his own issues to concentrate on him and it still hadn’t felt like enough for so long. 

The other shoe he had been waiting for for so long had crashed with ground shaking force. 

Alec was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of footsteps coming towards him. Alec stiffened up but didn’t turn to look. He was distantly surprised that anyone that would come up here would make audible footsteps. 

Alec stared in front of himself with some determination as he heard a lighter flick to life and a man letting out a long exhale. He knew it could only be Lucifer,  _ Lucifer _ really for fucks sake what had he been  _ thinking _ , and that Alec must be in his penthouse. Now that he wasn’t half out of his mind with desperation and had secured his help Alec just wasn’t sure what to say to him. How to act around  _ the actual devil. _

Luckily Lucifer was quick to break the tension running through the air. “You know, I’m not sure I’ve ever met a mortal of any kind quite like you. It’s odd.”

Alec couldn't help the scoff that left his throat. “I don’t know what you mean. I’m not different from anybody else.”

Lucifer hummed a bit derisively and took another drag off his cigarette. He exhaled slowly before he started talking again. “I don’t lie. Ever. It goes against my nature. While we are working together I expect you to do the same. One lie, even a small one, even a lie by omission and I’m gone. I’ve never trusted the children of Raziel.”

Alec heard the threat in his tone of voice and saw the look in his eyes and was quick to agree. Ever since his and Magnus’s brief break-up over the soulsword Alec had done his best to tell the truth anyway. “Of course. If we can’t at least trust each other a mission like this is bound to failure.”

Alec was looking at Lucifer and saw his smirk at his quick agreement and for a second he wanted to take it back. But he was going to be owing this being more than just his honesty by the time this was all over so he swallowed the impulse.

He was expecting Lucifer to take advantage of the agreement, but not the next question he asked. “I’m assuming you’ve seen Magnus’s warlock mark if you’re planning on marrying? How did you take it, the first time he showed you?”

Lucifer was making a complicated face that was hard for Alec to decipher. The only thing Alec could really tell was that he was hiding a lot of pain. It sent Alec’s mind reeling in the possibilities of why Lucifer would care or what was going on with him. Now that Alec was thinking about it he remembered how sad and broken he’d looked when he’d come into the club last night to see him at the piano.

Lucifer raised a pointed eyebrow at him when he noticed that Alec was staring. Alec was quick to turn back out to look at the stars remembering that first night that Magnus had showed him his eyes. It made him smile on reflex. “It was the first time we’d slept together. Magnus couldn’t keep up the glamour and was self-conscious about them, but they were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. So I told him that. He’s the most beautiful person I know inside and out. Whether he has them or not, or anything else that’s going on with him.”

Lucifer let out his own derisive scoff at that. Alec was quick to turn to him and glare. It was an important and special memory for him and even if it was the devil himself he wasn’t about to let him mock him and Magnus. Lucifer exhaled his smoke in a huff. “What? You expect me to believe you accepted his purely demon attributes with no hesitation whatsoever? You, who kill demons for a living? You think it’s beautiful he’s half a monster?”

Alec was slowly coming to a realization that he almost didn’t want to acknowledge. “Of course I did. Even back then I was coming to love everything about Magnus. People aren’t who they’re related to. The Clave is full of way worse monsters than the likes of Magnus. “Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.” One of Jace’s favorite quotes. It’s pretty accurate.”

Lucifer sneered, his face twisting. His voice rising when he talked. “So no matter what his warlock mark was, you would have found it beautiful no matter what?! Anything?!”

Alec didn’t shy away from meeting the devil’s eyes even as they burned a bright red, like they had last night, in anger. He was careful to keep his voice strong, but not combative when he replied. “Of course.”

Lucifer bared his teeth, and suddenly it was like his skin burned away to be replaced with a dark red covered in what could have been scars, or could have been the natural crags of a demon’s face. “Even if it was THIS!”

Alec made sure not to step back, not to flinch when Lucifer’s face changed. He half-expected it when it came, but didn’t know what the change was actually going to be. He was careful to get a good look before he responded, really thinking it over. He kept meeting Lucifer’s eyes even as Lucifer started calming down. “I’m not going to lie, it looks pretty horrific. Mostly because it looks like it hurts. If that’s what happened to Magnus when he dropped his glamour I’d be concerned, but I’d never think he was a monster. Never.”

Lucifer blinked and turned away, half-bowed over the railing to the balcony, his face turning back to the one Alec was used to. 

He thought he saw Lucifer’s eyes watering and tactfully decided to turn to look over the skyline himself. “Did you love them?”

Lucifer laughed a wet-sounding laugh. “I’ve come to find that I love the Detective dearly. I never meant to show her this  _ awful _ side of me. And now she’s run off. Not a one of us has seen her in weeks. She’s the second human to ever see. The other was Linda and even she could barely take it. She was useless for weeks. So don’t tell me you don’t understand when I tell you I’ve never met a mortal quite like you before. Willing to risk it all for someone you love like that. Willing to go against your upbringing and prejudice.”

Lucifer was practically spitting out the last few words, clearly overcome. It brought to mind everything Alec had to work through to get here. The disapproval from the Clave, the distrust from the downworld. He remembered the fight he’d had with Magnus about needing to prove himself and  _ hurt.  _ His voice was quiet and a bit thick when spoke again. “What happened? Who was special enough to make the devil fall for them?”

Lucifer choked on the new cigarette he had apparently lit, obviously surprised to be asked. “Her name is Detective Chloe Decker. She’s a miracle Dad had Amenadiel help bring into the world. None of my powers work on her, she makes me painfully, painfully, mortal in all senses of the word. Amenadiel would go on about soulmates. But I just believed it was another trick of Dad’s. I couldn’t stay away. Eventually the two of us attracted more attention than we could handle from some immortal beings. She got caught in the cross-fire. To protect her I had to kill a man and show her my face and wings all at once. I’d never killed a human before. Have you?”

Alec laughed a bit hallowly. “I hadn’t before. The civil war with the circle ended when I was about two, so I didn’t think I’d ever have to kill a shadowhunter. But it was so easy once I was called upon to do it. Just like killing anything else. I didn’t think about it. Actually I killed my first shadowhunter the night me and Magnus met. They were about to stab him. I killed about five more later that night. One was a joint take down between me and Magnus.”

Lucifer took a drag and mumbled his reply. “Gazing into the abyss indeed.”

Alec wasn’t insulted, but he couldn’t bring himself to regret any of the circle members he’d killed. “You said she disappeared? What did she say before she left?”

Alec chanced a glance at Lucifer out of the corner of his eye. He wasn’t sure what the man, and despite everything he  _ was _ a man, had been like before this woman but he seemed small now. Like he was hollowed out and emptied by whatever had happened between them. His shoulders were curled in in a way that didn’t seem to fit with him and his eyes gazed far into the distance. “She didn’t say much of anything. She was in the hospital for a couple nights following the attack and I was unable to visit. She sent Maze and I a text saying she was going on vacation and not to try and contact her before she got back. She took her offspring and Dan and left.”

Alec took a step back from the railing and faced Lucifer again in surprise. “She has a kid? Who’s Dan?”

Lucifer huffed and rolled his eyes. “Yes she has a daughter. Her name is Trixie but that makes her sound like a striper so I refuse to call her that. She’s about 11 I believe. It’s hard to remember human ages. She likes to draw unicorns on my face and fight me for the top hat in monopoly. Easy to bribe with chocolate cake and money. Dan aka Detective Douche is her ex-husband. Although I’m not suppose to call him that anymore since he’s done some favors for me. His girlfriend was killed by the man who attacked the detective and I. She was a good woman. I’m sure he wanted to get away as well.”

Alec had a hard time internalizing everything he was hearing. It sounded like the devil was becoming a family man? He was beginning to suspect he was even a good person, at least deep down. It was unsettling. “Did you know her well?”

Lucifer hummed a bit in thought while he smoked. “Fairly well I’d like to think. My mother inhabited her body for a while so I didn’t get to know her until recently. Most people are under the impression she was my step-mother.”

Alec’s eyes widened in real shock and he started choking on nothing in an attempt to say  _ anything _ to that kind of announcement. “Y-Your MOTHER?!”

Lucifer finally turned to look at him when he heard Alec’s reaction and grinned at Alec’s shock. “Yes, the goddess of all creation of course. You didn’t think dear old Dad could have made everything on his own did you? But you don’t have to worry, when she became a danger I sent her to her own empty dimension to start again. Have some children she can take care of without Dad to interfere or humans to endanger.”

Alec just stared out into the city and tried not to contemplate that.

Lucifer saw he wasn’t coming down from that shock for a good minute and offered up his pack of cigarettes. “Do you want one? Might help with the shock.”

Alec just looked at the pack blankly for a second before blinking twice to bring himself back. He shook his head. “Better not risk putting my body under anymore strain for a bit. Jace had to send me some energy just to get my iratze to work properly.”

“Ah! That reminds me!” Lucifer straightened up and put the pack in his pocket. Probably happy to have something he was meant to be doing. “You slept all of last night and today, it’s about 8. I’m meant to feed you and tell you to sleep either here or at your institute and then we can make plans to meet up after that and not a minute sooner according to Linda. Along with a reminder that she’s not that type of doctor. I ordered take out earlier I was just getting it before I spotted you out here.”

Lucifer turned to walk away back inside, but Alec reached out and grabbed his shoulder to stop him, unsure if he could bring this up again later. “I could find out where she is? See how she’s doing and if she’d like a mortal to talk to about everything? The major difference between me and her is that I grew up with this. Knowing it was real, fighting demons and talking to warlocks. She didn’t know. And she has no one to talk to about it except the people causing her confusion. That’s a dangerous state to be left alone in for a long time.”

Lucifer turned to face him and Alec was quick to remove his hand. Something like hope bloomed in Lucifer’s eyes. Alec almost hated seeing it, not sure if he would even be able to make a difference. “I suppose if you did we could consider it at least half your debt paid. I don’t expect you’d want to do it before we leave and put off saving Magnus?”

“Absolutely not.”

“I thought not. Now let’s go feed you.”

  
  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Alec ate more food in one go than he had in probably his whole life. Once he’d started eating he’d decided he’d never been more hungry. Lucifer only seemed to find the whole thing hilarious, so Alec didn’t feel too bad when he abandoned table manners in an effort to shove more food down his throat. 

After he ate, he decided to go back to the institute to sleep. It wasn’t that Lucifer’s couch was too uncomfortable or even that Lucifer was bad company even. But, that having finished with his immediate business there he felt the urge to leave as fast as he could. To give Lucifer some privacy to think things over or to get some time to himself he wasn’t sure.

Once outside the building he started walking, not giving the thought of a taxi any pause. The night was cool with a slight bite to the air and Alec huddled a little deeper in his leather jacket. He took in all the lights around him and imagined that Magnus was walking close next to him, telling a story about the last time he was in LA or something probably. 

Maybe Magnus had summoned a demon for a crotchety older actor or helped a young starlet with a voice potion. The possibilities were always endless with Magnus. 

Even now that Alec had witnessed Magnus failing at things he still believed that Magnus could do anything if he really wanted to. He had to believe it now more than ever. That Magnus could handle being in Edom alone with Lililth ready to attack. He had to. If he thought for a second that Magnus couldn’t handle it he was sure he’d break. 

Alec wondered if there were stars in Edom like the ones he was looking at, and if Magnus was also looking up at them.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


It took Alec a while to get back to the LA institute, but when he did he was surprised to find that his father was still up and in the ops center. His father always seemed the type to just look over anything important in the morning. 

He was hoping he could just slip by and head to his room to send a fire message to Cat and get some sleep before he left in the morning, but he had no such luck. As soon as he took a step in the ops center his father practically whipped around to look at him. 

Alec sighed internally, but stopped to wait for his father to approach, straightening up his posture and moving his hands behind his back in parade rest.

His father had a serious face, but still smacked his shoulder lightly in greeting before he started addressed him. “Hey, I was hoping I’d run into you.”

Alec was under no illusion that his father hadn’t been waiting in the ops center to corner him but didn’t comment on it. He simply inclined his head in acknowledgement. 

“We haven’t had much time to talk since you came to the LA institute. I wasn’t even told what your mission was. You were gone for an awfully long time and I was getting worried. I know… I know that stuff with Magnus hit you hard, his leaving-

“He made a sacrifice and saved all of us. He didn’t just” Alec made a violent gesture with his hand, “Run off.”

His father backed up half a step before getting a hold of himself again. He visibly took a second to recover himself. “I know he did son. I’m grateful for him. I’m just worried about you now that he’s gone. You don’t seem yourself. The last thing I want is you throwing your life away for him.”

Alec could hardly believe he was hearing this. “You talk like Magnus is never coming back. I won’t let that happen. I’m surprised you’d even notice I wasn’t myself with how little you’ve seen of me lately.”

A look of hurt Alec hadn’t been expecting came over his father’s face. “I know I haven’t been around much since your mother and I got our devorce, but I think I know my son at least a little after all this time. You haven’t checked in on Max since you first showed up. Normally you’d be dissecting his lessons and health no matter what else you were doing. Max put a plate of sandwiches in front of you the other day while you were on the computer and you didn’t even blink. I haven’t seen you go to your room to sleep or to the cafeteria for food. You’ve been going after this mission of yours with a single-minded focus. I’ve been around long enough to know that Shadowhunters that get like that don’t live for much longer.”

Alec’s mouth fell open at his father’s observations at first and then snapped shut so Alec could grit his teeth as they went on. He hated to admit it but his father wasn’t wrong. Alec relented slightly, his shoulders slumping a little as he relaxed his stance. “I guess you’re right about one thing. But the mission I’ve been working on… It’s to get Magnus back. I can’t focus on anything else until he’s safe. I’ve even had Izzy running the institute for me so I can concentrate on it. But I promise I’m not about to kill myself, or get myself killed.”

_ Not if I don’t have to anyway. _

The words echoed so loudly in Alec’s head he was sure his father had also heard them, he even reacted like he had, his face darkening like a storm cloud had settled over it. 

“Alec…. I know you claim to love him, but sometimes the best thing you can do for a loved one is to let them go. Do you really think he’d want this for you? This obsessive drive to ignore everything else to get him back? Whether you try to or not, living like this  _ is _ going to kill you one way or another.”

Alec was mad at what his father was saying but he also knew that his father was right about what Magnus would want and the thought made him too tired to come out swinging. “Dad, I know I didn’t tell you sooner and I’m sorry. But right before Magnus left we got engaged. I do love him. I can’t see myself ever loving anyone else. We’ve decided to spend the rest of our lives together, and even if that means spending them down in Edom I’ll do it. I know you’re right. I know Magnus would hate what I’m doing right now. But I can’t stop. Even if he was somehow able to yell at me from Edom I wouldn’t stop. Because Magnus thinks of everyone before himself and I’m going to be the one to risk everything for him for once.”

Despite Alec’s even tone it looked like he’d slapped his father. “You’re engaged? Really? I’m happy for you.”

His tone sounded more shocked and vaguely pained than happy, so Alec figured he was within his rights to ask a sardonic, “Are you really?”

Robert sighed a tired sounding sigh and ran a hand down his face. “I suppose I’m not. Mostly because of the circumstances. Partly because some days I’m worried I cursed you and this seems like confirmation honestly.”

Alec actually laughed a bit in surprise at his father’s answer. “You think you cursed me? How? You think you killed the wrong demon and it made me gay?”

Robert gave a tired smile and sat on the steps nearby, patting the step next to him for Alec to sit. Alec did so reluctantly, mostly out of curiosity. Both Max and Izzy were much closer to their father than he was. Even Jace got more said to him than Alec usually got. His father actively wanting to tell him a story about his past was practically unpresidented. 

Robert shifted uncomfortably before he started. “I’ve told all you kids how close I was with Jace’s father back in our school days. But I’ve never told you just how we became so estranged. The truth is, when we were young, about 17, he told me that he was in love with me. I’d never heard of men falling in love with each other before, and that mixed with the illegality of having feelings for your parabatai had me reacting in a strong negative nature.”

Alec felt a wave of cold sweep over his body. It sounded like an echo. If he’d told Jace how he felt instead of taking the parabatai bond, or even after, they could have acted out this story. “What did you say to him?” His voice was cold but with a shaky undercurrent. 

Robert’s face was one of deep regrets, but Alec could barely fathom it, so lost in reflection. “I told him he was disgusting. That I regretted taking the parabatai rune with him. That I never wanted to see him again. But mostly I was talking from fear. I didn’t, couldn’t, have returned his romantic feelings. But he was the best friend I ever had. And I never did see him or speak to him after that. As I got older I wanted to apologize. But I never got the chance. Part of me felt I never deserved the chance in the first place. When I heard that his son needed a place to go I jumped at the chance as some sort of redemption. Maybe given our history I should have looked further into Jace’s parentage, but I was desperate for the chance to make something up to him.”

Alec was nervous to tell his father what he was about to say, but he felt it was important for him to hear. “When I was younger I thought I was in love with Jace. As soon as he showed up I got feelings for him. I almost didn’t take the parabatai rune with him I was so convinced.”

Robert looked at his son with wide eyes, but his voice was soft when he spoke. “Did you ever tell him?”

Alec could see in his face he wanted to know how Jace handled a situation that he’d failed at. He was proud that his parabatai had done better. That things had worked out in the end. “It came out. At first we both pretended that it hadn’t and not acknowledging it only hurt us both. But Jace said and proved that he loved me like a brother no matter what. And once I started getting feelings for Magnus and saw what real romantic love felt like I was able to get over Jace and get back to loving him as my parabatai. It hurt at first. But working through it made us stronger. I’m sure it would have made you and Michael Wayland’s bond stronger too.”

Robert smiled at the story but Alec could see that he still looked haunted. “I know I haven’t been the best father, but at least in this regard I hope I can make up for some of my mistakes with you. It would be about time.”

Alec reached out a hand and put it on his father’s shoulder. “Just trust me. With Magnus, with the institute. I promise I’m thinking of what’s best. I know it’s not what you had in mind for my future, but I’ve never been happier than when I’m with Magnus. I just want that back, want  _ him _ back. That may take me to some dangerous places, but I know what I’m doing. You just have to be there for Max and Izzy if things go wrong.”

Robert looked and  _ saw _ the determination and intent in his son’s face. He let himself see for a minute before he muttered. “Facilis descensus averno.”

Alec smiled. “The descent into Hell is easy.”

Robert smiled back thinly. “That’s right. I do trust you.” He patted Alec’s hand twice and stood to leave, “Goodnight, son.”

Alec watched his back for a few seconds. Only saying “goodnight.” When it was too late for his father to hear. He couldn’t remember his father ever telling him he trusted him, or talking to him like that. It was no wonder really that him and Izzy got on so well. 

He was slow getting to bed that night.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I have never written a fight scene before really, so I hope this one turned out okay. I know Alec seems a bit loose lipped in this, but in my and his defense he's not doing to good. He definitely wasn't really thinking at that point.


End file.
